Day..56?

A few weeks ago, I reinstalled my games onto my laptop. I've been playing them pretty much non-stop ever since.

Day 55

My angry pillow guy.

Day 54

My friend, Luci, brought this giant shot glass back for me when she was on vacation there two weeks ago.

Day 53

When I'm not reading Pharmacy Tech study guides, I tend to stick to books on American history written by classic American authors.

Day 52

The collection of books and binders my coworker, Luci, gave to me. It doesn't look like much, but every one of those suckers is between 100-500 pages.

I am studying a lot, but there is a lot of information to take in. Some of it is pretty interesting though. Did you know many illegal drugs are considered prescriptions? The pharmacist and I got into a debate over the merits of heroin use (a class 1 prescription) in terminally-ill patients.

That's definitely more interesting than the chapter on Laminar Flow Hoods. We don't even prepare chemo drugs or anything like that. I'm going to have to spend a day working at the hospital to understand that one.

Day 51

I'm pretty feminine, so while at work, I stick to what my coworkers refer to as my "princess shoes." Which hopefully means they don't secretly think I might be a man.

I wear a women's size 11, so when I find shoes in my size, I tend to buy them in several colors because I have such a problem ever finding shoes. Most of these are just $7 Walmart shoes, and they wear out after about 100 wearings, so I need to make sure to have a few extra pairs.

Day 50!

And I'm going to use it to talk more about my teeth.

This is called a Rapid Palatal Expander.

I'll summarize. This orthodontic appliance is used to widen your top jaw by separating the plates on the roof of your mouth. You do so by inserting the long, metal part on the edge of the key (the blue thing) into holes in the very middle of the appliance. If you want, you can see how it works in that link. Enjoy the nightmares.

That piece of metal was in my mouth from 8th to 11th grade. My orthodontist, I kid you not, put it in upside down, and he fucked with my mouth every six weeks for the next three years and never corrected his mistake. My tongue is always pushing against the inside of my teeth, which is why it's important for me to wear my retainer. It would be pretty easy for me to fuck up my teeth again.

It also gave me a gap about the size of a centimeter between my front teeth. And you know how understanding 8th grade girls are of that kind of thing. Freaking braces.

Day 49

What's in the bright yellow box that I usually keep on my nightstand? I'll tell you what's in the bright yellow box.





That would be my retainer. I'm the only person I know who listened to my orthodontist and actually still wears my retainer (I got my braces off in January 2003). I'm supposed to wear it three nights a week or an hour every day, and since it's such a pain in the ass to clean, I usually wear it every two or three nights.


It's made of really thick plastic, kind of like that microwaveable, dishwasher safe Tupperware.






And when I put it in, I always think of those plastic vampire teeth.

Day 48

I wear a blush that comes as a loose powder, and the container exploded when I opened it this morning. I was laughing my ass off when I yelled to Gabe to come take a picture.

At least blended right into my cardigan.

Day 47

At night, I usually keep my wedding ring in one of the bowls I have on my nightstand. Gabe keeps his on the arm of his glasses.

So, marrieds, what do you do? Do you wear it? Do you have a specific place to keep it?

Day 46

He's watching you.

Day 45

I found this Bump-It in my friend's bathroom. There was a smaller one, but this was just so ridiculous that I HAD to use it.








Searching for an elegant style for your special occasion? Well, this won't help, but you can look like an idiot in half the time.









It's also great for Snooki impressions.

Day 43

My daily rotation of makeup. You don't even want to see a picture of ALL of my makeup because it would blow your mind.

Day 42

This is of my suitcase and computer bag. We have three big suitcases, but I don't want to leave something that obvious in my car all day since I drive a station wagon and there's no trunk in which I can hide my bags. I'm spending the next few nights in town because I'm babysitting for a coworker and watching her apartment while she's in Vegas.

Also the NEW SEASON OF SURVIVOR started today, Heroes vs. Villains! I know I'm not supposed to, but I am totally rooting for the villains. I mean, yeah, I love that scruffy teddy bear named Rupert, but dude, Boston Rob is back! They should have just had this be Survivor: Villains Only, and then make them play The Most Dangerous Game. That would really make you earn the title of sole survivor.

Day 41

The view from the driveway. There is nothing for miles.

Day 40

One of these makes me smile, and the other makes me scream in frustration. Can you tell the difference?

Hint: Fuck Dryel.

Day 39

I made a joke earlier about not having straightened my hair today, and it was still a good day.

That wasn't a joke, My hair is totally awful and somewhere between curly and straight. And after a day stuck in an elastic, it is a mess.

I hate my stupid, weird hair. I should just shave it off and wear a wig, like the ancient Egyptians.

Day 38

These stupid dry clean only pants didn't get clean when I used Dryel.

So I handwashed them. They'll likely take about a year to dry, but hey, they'll be clean.

Day 37

This is what I see on my breaks. Today, I took two extra breaks because I was so fucking mad at everything. Sorry for twitter-bitching all day.

Day 36

This dog is seriously always on my bed. At least he's on Gabe's side, but seriously, get the hell off my blanket, dog.

Gabe and I are both blanket hogs, so we have a system where I have my blanket and he has his, and we can keep loving each other.






We have a queen-sized bed. Like I said, our closet is proportionate to the size of the room, which is tiny. But we're grateful to be here. I'm paying down my debt! I actually have payment plans! Something that would never happen if I was paying rent somewhere.

Day 35

Our tiny closet goes really well with our tiny room. I get mad at Gabe when he messes it up because there is no room for messes; the entire closet takes up less than 3 square feet of floor space.

About a month ago, I purchased a clearanced storage-shelf system. I used to hang everything, but my clothes took up the entire rack, so Gabe's clothes were just sort of shoved anywhere they would fit. Now, they're organized! Kind of! At the very least, we're using every spare bit of room, and Gabe's crappy t-shirt collection has a place to go.

And I know, I should be nicer about his t-shirts, but he only has maybe 10 t-shirts, but some of them are over 10 years old, and he only wears a rotation of about five shirts. He's worn and washed some of those shirts almost 1000 times.

1000 times. 1000 TIMES.

Day 34

It's crappy t-shirt day! And crazy eyes day!

Day 33

It's Balance Things On Your Father-In-Law's Head While He's Napping In The Living Room Day!

Day 32

That was the $50,000 on Millionaire tonight.

That says "Who is Shigeru Miyamoto?"

Thanks to Gabe, I have known who that is for years. That is the creative game manager or something like that for Nintendo. He came up with Mario, The Legend of Zelda, Donkey Kong, and Starfox.

Day 31-Story Time

Lately, Gabe's hair has been looking a lot more like Luke Skywalker's. So tonight after work, I decided it was time to give him a haircut.





Luckily for me, my father-in-law knew where his clippers would, so I didn't have to cut Gabe's hair using kitchen scissors. The last time I resorted to scissors, Gabe wore a hat for two months and was really, really mad.















I have no idea how, but I managed to get his hair to almost completely cooperate, cowlicks and all. I wanted to give him a sort-of Robert Downey Jr., but instead, he got a Philip Defranco.















He's a little wary of having to spend that 30 seconds a day tousling it with mousse, but I think if he ever wants to have sex again, he can get get over it.

Day 30

My alarm clock has a very bright light for the snooze button. Really bright. Bright enough that I can almost read with no lights on.

I've had this alarm clock since 2001, and that light, that freaking light has irritated me since the first time I plugged it in. Don't ask me why I haven't just switched alarm clocks. I've bought two since this one, but only because I moved twice and couldn't figure out where I packed it, and I needed an alarm clock for the next day. As soon as I find this, I always switch back. It's not like it's fancy or anything; I think I spent somewhere between $10 and $20.

I usually keep something on top of the button. In high school, I used silly putty. In college, I made something less disgusting out of Play-Doh (the Silly Putty attracted bugs, although it did discourage using the snooze button), but I dropped it and it shattered a few years ago.

So for two years or so, I've had this ridiculous bright light keeping me up at night. Sometimes, I'll wear a sleeping mask, but this light...Jesus, you need to come over sometime and you will make fun of me, wondering why I didn't just throw the clock the hell away years ago. Do you know how long I've had this? This is a pre-9/11 alarm clock. I mean, I've had this since the time when people still like George W. Bush.

Something else you should know is that I sleepwalk. It's not funny. I cannot stress that enough because people seem to think it's amusing. While asleep, I've done strange things. I've showered, gotten fully dressed, and gone back to sleep. I've done the dishes. Occasionally, I'll get up and have conversations with Gabe, and according to him, I'm really honest when I'm asleep.

Last night, I found electrical tape and covered the light on the alarm clock. I didn't even know we had electrical tape in the house. I have no idea how long I searched for it last night, or why I didn't use the duct tape that was sitting less than a foot from the clock.

Day 29

My train ticket from the Molentary Express. I won't spoil anything for you by telling you where it leads.

...and yes, that is in a frame.

Day 28

It is almost impossible to get a good picture of Gus. He's that long red blur in the second picture. It's my own fault for giving him a treat, though. Now he's all riled up and barking his head off.

Day 27

This is my two-year planner. I keep everything I need to remember in here, like my work schedule, my grocery list, my friends' birthdays, and the Harry Potter 7 release date. I have a bad memory for dates, so if I don't have this all written down, I will forget it, and if I don't have it with me, I'll worry about it. I love this planner, and even though it's only January, I'm already worried about whether or not I'll remember to buy a new one in time. (I guess I'll just have to write it in on the page for December.)

Day 26

My co-worker, Luci, and her new friend.

Who buys these gigantic teddy bears? Giants? That isn't a teddy bear. That's a mattress with eyes.

They kind of remind me of My Size Barbie.

Day 25

These are my fuzzy pink flip-flop slippers. They make me happy because they are so ridiculous.

I need all the happy I can get this week. I'm working overtime because the usual weekday morning girl is really sick. I don't really want to, but I need to say yes to everything they ask because I don't want to be laid off. They're not doing layoffs or anything, but there is a lot of talk about it, and I want them to think "oh, we don't want to lay her off, she's always willing to go the extra mile. No matter how ridiculous her shoes are."

Day 24

Oh, I always forget to wipe my card before picking jp ozz ho.

(At the Pit Stop gas station this evening.)

Day 23

My fingernails are awesome.

This was a pretty lame cop-out of a picture. But I'm tired. I don't feel like finding something to take a picture of that has a story behind it.

Instead, I went through my old SD card and found this lame video of my friend Alea and I, and I uploaded it to YouTube and everything. We have probably watched this a hundred times since she took it, and I have no idea what about it was so funny to us.

Day 22

My HoMedics Sound Spa, that has "10 nature sounds" including Chime, Heartbeat, and White Noise. Which I do not consider nature sounds, but I still love to use this machine. My favorite noise on it is Thunder.

I can't sleep when it's silent. My alarm clock, which had been my background noise until I bought this, also has built-in nature sounds, like Brook and Ocean...and Cathedral Bell. Why do they always come with sounds like a telephone ringing? Who finds that soothing? Lonely people?

Day 21

Every time I have to get fingerprinted for a job (this is the third time since 2007), I worry that I'm going to be arrested on the spot because of the time I didn't show up for jury duty. I didn't actually have to show up since I was in college in a different state, so I wrote them and told them so, but they never contacted me in any way to let me know that they had received my note.

And I've passed like six background checks since then, so I know that they must have gotten my note, but it doesn't stop me worrying.

So today, I got fingerprinted so that I can get my tech license. I went into town with Gabe this morning, and I was going to go straight to the court to get this done. Instead, I pulled into a gas station to fill up, and when I left, my left turn signal started freaking out and blinking really fast. I pulled into the Kmart parking lot and checked it. It didn't work.

I live on a dirt road, and even our driveway is dirt, so the entire back of the car was just filthy. I'm not trying to play up a little dirt; I mean that the only part of the back window that you could even see through was about half the area where the back wiper goes because it was caked with mud, and I have had no extra money for to even get windshield wiper fluid until today. The license play was barely legible. And no way was I touching it with my bare hands until I washed the car. I drove to a gas station and realized that the only bill I had in my wallet was a ten, and I was already kind of freaking out that a cop would catch me before I got the blinker fixed because I'm only afraid of five things: elevators, webcams, spiders, bees, and cops. So I just put my ten in that damn machine and got a fifteen-minute car wash. But the car looks really, really clean. It was really windy, though, so at this point, I was completely soaked, including my coat.

I'm not very good with cars. I was pretty proud of myself that I even managed to find the manual, figure out what kind of light I needed, and almost install it myself. I could get the wiring off the light cover (one of two big, transparent red pieces of plastic that go on the back of the car that the lights are in) just fine, but I couldn't get the damn bulb cover (little black part that the bulb is in that screws into the red part) off. Instead, I drove to an auto part store and brought the entire cover (red part) in with me. Apparently, the bulb had shorted or something and melted its cover (the black part) into the red part, so there was no way I could have gotten it out on my own. But it's fixed now, and I did it without asking anybody that I knew for help, and I'm pretty proud of that.

That was my day. Soaked to the bone, reeking of that weird oil/tire smell from an auto-parts store with my fingers black from that fingerprinting ink. So much for my last day off this week.

Day 20

I'm not sure if you can tell, but I have a thing for polka-dots.

I found a set of these at an ARC thrift store in mid-2008. They were $40 each. Well...as much as I loved them, I wasn't really willing to shell out $80 for a set of second-hand chairs. After a week or so, they were discounted 50% off, PLUS it was a holiday, so everything was an additional 50% off, so I only ended up paying $10 a chair.

They were the first piece of furniture that I purchased, as my couch, bed, kitchen table, etc. were all either hand-me-downs or gifts. A few people that I know think these chairs are ridiculous, probably because the polka dots are all different colors, but I don't really care. They are very comfortable, and in my opinion, totally awesome.

Day 19

This is my in-laws' backup dog, Gus. Get it? Beau and Gus. Bogus.

Look, I didn't make it up. Personally, I would have gone with Jangles.

They got him from a shelter last summer, and he is sometimes a very, very bad dog (his last owners beat him, starved him, and almost killed him, so we don't punish him unless he's really bad). Most of the time, he's really sweet, and he only weighs like three pounds, so it's not hard to pick him up to get him to stop whatever he's decided needs to be destroyed.

Day 18

This is one of my favorite video games. The only thing that would make this game any better is if it was Super Princess Daisy, who is my favorite, and who I always play as during Mario Party.

I remember this game was highly criticized when it came out because you use Peach's emotions to achieve certain tasks, and the emotions are so sexist that it's easy to see how some women would be offended. When she's angry, she bursts into flames, and enemies that gets near her will also catch fire. When she's sad, she cries giant fountains of water and runs really fast. This game should be bundled in a box with a pint of full-fat ice cream and a pack of tampons.

I think they don't make this game anymore, since it's listed as $87 on Amazon. Which is understandable because of the whole "incredibly sexist" thing.